Am I angry again?

I was told that I should behave. I was told that I will be missed. Nothing of this is actually real. Because otherwise that would mean I should be the best person on the planet. And I am not this kind of person.

Sometimes I would appreciate if people underestimate me. Because that would mean no disappointment. Though I would suffer because no one on this planet believes in me. But I feel like sometimes people except too much. And because they believe it I believe it too. So in the end I won't disappoint just them. I will disappoint me as well.

And what could be worse then disappointment from myself?

I know that sounds very confident - but I think that people overestimate me sometimes. Like teachers who expects me to be good but I am not because I can't. Or parents who believe teachers.

Or people who think that I can do that. But I can't. That happened to me so many times that I am surprised of myself. Because I haven't lost my confidence. I am still confident and I still know who I am. And I am proud of that. Because that is what people miss or what they think is attractive - it is only easy - doing like I don't have any confidence - like I hate myself.

But this sort of people is not attractive anymore. Usually it is just the way how you can look poor or sad. Bud sadness is not what people are looking for.

So just forget you've read this page.

Thanks :-

Your dear friend - I hope dearest

Mar